California Girl
by writergirrrl22
Summary: Clare goes off to sunny california for her summer break, which is much needed. when she comes back, no one knows what to make of the obvious changes, epsecially one KC Guthrie, who is currently dating Queen of the Sophomores, Jenna Middleton.
1. California Gurls

"_I know a place, where the grass is really greener. Warm, wet, and wild, there must be something in the water."_

Clare smiled as her new favorite song played on her radio to wake her up. _This is a good sign, _she thought before opening her eyes and getting out of bed. She walked over to her dresser to where she had the perfect outfit laid out.

"_Sippin' gin and juice, laying underneath the palm trees,"_

"Undone," she sang along happily in her underwear and t-shirt.

She spent the rest of the song getting dressed, fixing her hair, putting in her brand new contacts, and applying the perfect amount of makeup (her sister Darcy had taught her many tricks over the summer).

When the song was over on the radio, she decided to listen to it again, and plugged the iPod she'd gotten for her birthday up to the docking station her sister had passed down to her.

"California girls, we're unforgettable! Daisy Dukes, bikinis on top! Sun-kissed skin, so hot, we melt your popsicle!" She sang, while dancing around her room and continuing to get ready for what was supposed to be the first day of the rest of her life.

She had spent her whole summer vacation in California with her sister. Darcy been accepted to the University of Southern California, and had decided to fly straight there from Kenya. She begged for two straight weeks for her parents to let Clare fly out there for the whole summer, and finally, they gave in. Clare was thrilled to not be stuck in Canada all summer; the chances of her running into KC were too high, and she couldn't risk that, not after what had gone down the last time she'd seen him.

And California had changed Clare.

In Cali, Darcy had gone to the gym every morning, so Clare went too, causing her to lose all of her remaining baby fat within the first month. After that, the sisters would go shopping for cute clothes, which meant Clare had a whole new wardrobe full of fun, bright, and exciting American clothes. After shopping, the girls would spend hours on the beach, leaving Clare's hair bleached from the sun, and her skin more tan than she ever would have thought possible. At night, Darcy would take Clare out dancing, where she'd met plenty of guys, and, not to make her sound like a whore, but many times she'd hook up with them. She still believed in abstinence, but hey, nobody said kissing was against the rules!

Clare had definitely come out of her shell, and she was excited to start anew at Degrassi.

"California girls, we're undeniable! Fine, fresh, fierce, we got it on lock! West coast represent, now put your hands up-"

"Whoa, Clare," Alli said, bursting into her room, "Is that you?"

Clare stopped dancing and turned to grin at her best friend. They ran at each other and hugged.

"I've missed you so much Alli!" Clare exclaimed.

"I've missed you too, but look at you!" Alli said, holding Clare at arm's length, "You look completely different! You're tan, you're blonde, you're skinny as mess, and who knew you could dance?"

"All the perks of spending three months in sunny California with Darcy!" Clare explained, sounding girly-er than she ever had in her life.

"Wow, you've completely changed," Alli said, sounding a bit suspicious, "This is all for…"

"Of course not, I'm completely over KC!" Clare said happily. She smiled brightly.

"Oh, ow," Alli said, shielding her eyes, "You're crazy white teeth are blinding me, and wait! Where are your glasses?"

"Darcy got me contacts because she didn't want me getting a glasses tan," Clare laughed.

"Wow, this is great," Alli gushed, "You have to tell me everything."

"No I don't."

Alli cocked her head in confusion.

"Well I mean, I could tell you everything, but you'll forget everything once I tell you about all the BOYS I 'met'," Clare put air quotes around the word met, implying that she did more than meet them, "And I really don't wanna waste my breath."

Alli's eyes grew huge and they both burst into excited giggles.

"Come on, tell me on the way to school!" Alli exclaimed, pulling on Clare's arm. "By the way, that is the cutest outfit I've ever seen."

"Thanks, got it in Cali," Clare smiled, grabbing her brand new Coach purse as she left her room, letting the door slam behind the two girls.

**A/N: i am aware that this is extremely out of character for Clare, but just roll with it, the old Clare we all know and love isn't completely gone, she's still buried somewhere deep inside of the new Clare. but i feel like this is something Clare needs to go through. i'm gonna tell you now, Clare will never be the same again. California gave her self-confidence in her appearance, personality, and ability to get guys (bc we all know she was doubting that); California gave her her sister back after a whole year, even if it was just for a few months. Clare needed Darcy in her first year at Degrassi, especially after what happened with KC. i'm not sure yet if this is gonna be a "Clare gets the guy back" story just yet or what, but i'll put it under Clare/KC anyway.**

**Well, i hope you enjoyed the first chapter! rememberrrrrr: REVIEWS = LOVE! so please review :)**


	2. OMG

**A/N: i couldn't resist, i had to update again :)**

"Hey KC," Connor said as he approached KC and Jenna, "How was your summer?"

KC was sitting on the steps of Degrassi with his arm around Jenna. Some of KC's basketball friends and Jenna's Power Squad friends were there. A radio was blasting music.

"It was great," KC said. He was glad Connor was talking to him again. After last year…no, he wasn't gonna go there again; he felt bad enough as it was. He didn't like to think of how much he'd hurt Clare. "I didn't see you around though, or we totally would have hung out." He didn't see Clare much either, he hoped she hadn't wasted her summer trying to avoid him and Jenna.

"Yeah, I went back to my parents' house for the summer. You know, they missed me." Connor answered. At that Jenna snorted.

"So hey," KC said loudly, trying to cover what Jenna had done, "Um, what classes are you taking this year?"

As Connor talked about all the Gifted classes he was taking this year, KC vaguely realized the song on the radio had changed to Usher and will.'s new song, one of his favorites.

"…and I'll be taking advanced chemistry, even though it's a grade eleven class-"

"Hey," Jenna interrupted. Connor shot her a look, but she ignored him and pointed her finger, "Who's that girl talking to Alli? Is she new?"

KC's eyes followed where Jenna was pointing and Connor turned around to see.

"No way!" Connor said.

"It can't be…" KC said. He'd recognize that girl anywhere.

"It is!" Connor said.

"Oh my gosh," KC said.

"Who is it?" Jenna demanded.

"It's Clare," KC said in a voice filled with shock.

"What?" Jenna screeched. "That can't be her! I thought she was gone!"

"Psh, yeah, for the summer," Connor said condescendingly, then he ran to hug Clare.

Jenna glared at him, then turned to KC and pulled at his hand, "Come on, let's go somewhere else."

"Why?" KC asked.

"Well, you know," Jenna smiled devilishly. No, KC didn't know. He had drawn the line at what she was getting at, even though she begged daily it felt like. It's not like KC didn't wanna lose it, but he didn't want either of them to get hurt because of it. He still remembered what had happened that night at the Sport's Banquet.

"Jenna, we've had this discussion," KC sighed, "Not now, especially not in the janitor's closet at Degrassi!"

"Fine," she huffed, pouting her pink lips.

KC sighed, bent down, and kissed her, and said, "Again, I'm sorry."

"Sure, sure, whatever," she said.

"Jenna, come on!" A scrawny girl with hair an awful shade of reddish-brown called.

"See you at lunch?" Jenna asked.

KC bent down and kissed her again. "Sure thing," he said, smiling.

He watched as Jenna skipped off to be with one of the followers she'd picked up over the summer. Something about her being the only Niner on the Power Squad last year and being the only girl in grade ten to be on it this year made all the underclassmen follow her everywhere.

That's when he remembered the real reason Jenna had wanted to leave.

"Clare," he said under his breath, turning to see if she was still where he had first seen her.

She was. KC sat there staring at her, taking in all that had changed about her. She obviously hadn't been hiding out in her room, trying to avoid him like he'd thought. She was tanner, blonder, taller, and thinner than when he last saw her. Her wardrobe had gone from earth tones like dull greens and browns to bright pinks, yellows, and blues. And she was wearing a mini skirt, not her old private school uniform skirt; this was a real, honest to goodness mini skirt. He couldn't tell what it was, but she was literally glowing, radiating happiness. He hadn't seen her like that in…ever.

Just then, Clare looked at him and made eye contact. Instead of quickly looking away and blushing like she used to, she smiled a blindingly white smile and waved at him.

At first he didn't know what to do. He looked around, then pointed himself spluttered out "M-me?"

She laughed and nodded, yelling, "Yes, silly, you! Get over here!"

Her voice shocked him. It wasn't timid and shy like it used to be, it was loud, clear, happy, and strong. As KC made his way over to his old group of friends cautiously, he wondered what the HECK happened to Clare over the summer.

"Hey!" She said cheerfully when he was finally standing across from her. "How was your summer?"

He looked around at Connor and Alli. Connor was grinning widely, and even Alli was smiling at him. He felt like he'd walked into an alternate universe, one where things were basically the same as they were back in the first semester of his ninth grade year, except for one obvious detail.

"Um, it was good," he said.

Clare waited with a smile on her face for him to continue.

"I um," he started. He ran his hands through his hair, looked up at the sky and squinted his eyes, "Actually, it was boring. All I did was hang out around here and play some basketball. But, um, where did you go?"

"I spent the summer in California with my sister," Clare said happily. KC just could not get used to that.

"Well, you look great," he said.

"Thanks," Clare smiled. Just then the bell rang. "Oh, dang, I was hoping we could all catch up some more, but I guess I have to get to my Advanced Robotic Engineering class."

"With Coach Lindler?" KC asked excitedly, and when Clare nodded and said, "Mhmm," KC said, "Me too!"

"That's great, we can walk together!" Clare said.

"Well, that's great for you guys, while I'm stuck in a boring Study Hall," Alli whined.

"Me too!" Connor said. Alli rolled her eyes and mumbled, "Great," just under her breath.

"Look on the bright side, Alli, you might meet a cute guy," Clare encouraged as they walked into the school.

What was this? Clare encouraging Alli to look at guys? It was usually the other way around! KC was definitely in an alternate universe.

"You're right," Alli said, taking off, "See you at lunch!" She called over her shoulder. Connor took off after her.

KC and Clare began making their way to Coach Lindler's class. KC felt awkward, and kept messing with his hair, but Clare was smiling and waving at everyone. He felt a ping of jealousy when other guys noticed her.

"So, your sister lives in California now?" KC asked. He'd met Darcy over winter break last year while she was back home on a break from working in Kenya. She was pretty and nice, and Clare obviously adored her.

"Yeah, she's attending USC," Clare answered.

"Is she living…you know, alone?" KC asked cautiously. Clare had told him what had happened to her, and he didn't really see her living alone after that, ever.

Clare's smile faltered a bit, but she said cheerfully, "No, she's actually rooming with Manny Santos."

"Oh," KC said. He felt stupid for bringing it up. "Sorry, for-"

"It's okay," Clare cut him off. She stopped walking and faced him, looking him right in the eyes. "At least you care enough to ask."

In that moment, KC caught a glimpse of the old Clare. The shy and timid smart girl he'd fallen for on his very first day at Degrassi. He tried to hold onto that, so he held her gaze for a long time, then slowly, ever so slowly, he started inching toward her face. It would be so easy to kiss her; he could tell she wanted to kiss him too. _Oh my gosh, _he thought. He was breathing hard, and just as he was closing his eyes, the final bell rang.

He jumped backed, still breathing hard, and ran his hand through his hair. He noticed Clare hadn't jumped, and that she wasn't breathing hard like him. _Had she wanted to kiss me? I thought I saw it in her eyes, but maybe I'm imagining things._ No, he definitely saw something there.

To avoid an awkward situation, he gestured to the classroom door and lamely said, "Um, class."

She giggled as she walked in, and as he watched her, before he walked in after her, he said under his breath, "Oh my gosh."

**A/N: hey so i knowwwwww this chapter is really long, but hey, you know you love it!  
anyway, i hope you guys are liking this story and also please please please REVIEW :)**


	3. Can't Stand It

**Disclaimer: i don't anything. song is "I Can't Stand It" by NeverShoutNever!  
A/N: sooo, idk if you noticed, but i deleted chapter three. why you ask? after re-reading and re-reading, plus some of the feedback i got from you guys, i decided i really didn't like the chapter and it didn't go with what i was trying to do with this story. so just pretend it never happened :) **

"So, KC," Jenna said, "Do you wanna come over to my place? My parents won't be home from work until 6:30."

KC was standing outside of school, talking to some basketball friends, with his arm around Jenna.

He looked down at her, and almost said yes, but right before he answered, he saw Clare and Alli out of the corner of his eye. They were surrounded by four other girls he knew from school, but didn't really know.

"Uh," KC said, "I…can't. I, um, have to study for a quiz in my Robotics class. Maybe some other time?"

"Fine," Jenna pouted. Just then a horn honked. "Oh, there's my brother, I better go. Call me tonight."

She kissed him, then took off. When she was out of sight, he said goodbye to his friends and ran to where Clare and Alli were now standing alone.

"Come on, California Clare studies?" Alli asked in disbelief.

"Hey, w-what's going on?" KC asked.

Alli crossed her arms and said, "It's the first day of school, and Clare can't hang out because she has to study."

"Alli, I still have to get good grades," Clare tried to reason.

"Who could possibly have given you an assignment on the first day back? Besides, I wanted to hear more about Corey!" Alli whined.

"Who's Corey?" KC asked quickly. He didn't care if he seemed jealous.

"He's just a guy I met in California," Clare answered.

"Humph, yeah, 'met' isn't the word you used when you told me about him. It's also not the word you used when you told me about Will, Stephen, Matt, Tyler, Chris, or Shawn." Alli said.

"What?" KC asked.

"KC, it's not a big deal," Clare said.

"Yes it is! If you didn't meet these guys, what did you do with them?" KC almost yelled.

"KC, why do you even care?" Alli asked.

"I-I don't," KC said. He looked at Clare out of the corner of his eye. She had an expression of slight amusement on her face.

"You two are ridiculous," she said, chuckling. "Anyway, I really do have to go home and study. Coach Lindler is giving us a quiz tomorrow."

"Ugh, that crazy Robotics teacher?" Alli asked.

Clare nodded.

"Fine, call me later, I WILL hear the rest of the Corey story," Alli said. Clare laughed and said okay as her friend walked away to change out of her school clothes before she got home.

"Hey," KC said, suddenly having an idea, "I have to study for that quiz too, you wanna study together at the Dot?"

Clare thought about it for a few moments, "Nah, the Dot's too crowded, it makes it hard to concentrate. How about we go to that place at the park?"

KC's stomach clenched. That place at the park, as in THEIR place?

KC gulped, and hoped it wasn't too noticeable, then said, "Sure, sounds great."

When they got to their place at the park, they sat down in the grass and opened up their books. Clare turned her iPod on and played a song KC didn't recognize.

He looked around. Their place was the same as it had been the last time they went there. Their spot was a small meadow far enough away from the playground that it was quiet, but not far enough away that they couldn't see children playing. They were in plain sight, and all they were doing was studying, so why was KC so nervous?

He looked at Clare.

"_Baby, I love you, I never want to let you go. The more I think about the more I want to let you know that everything you do is super duper cute, and I can't stand it," _the song from Clare's iPod sang. The song couldn't sum up his feelings more perfectly at that moment.

No, he thought, looking away from her, I'm with Jenna! I broke up with Clare! I can't be falling for her again!

He looked back over at her, and knew without a doubt that breaking things off with Clare was the biggest mistake of his life so far. Sure, Jenna's pretty, but could he have a three-hour conversation about robots with Jenna? No, she didn't know anything about robots, not even something from Star Wars. Jenna also didn't want to talk about computers, or math, or science. All she wanted to talk about was her hair, her makeup, basketball, and sex; she was a typical cheerleader.

"_I saw you across the room and I knew that this was gonna blossom into something beautiful, you're beautiful," _the song sang. She is beautiful, KC thought.

"Clare, I can't believe how much you've changed," KC said.

She looked up from the book she was reading and smiled.

"The only thing that's changed about me is my appearance," she said, closing the book and setting it down, "I'm still the same Clare, I just look better,"

"I think you looked beautiful before," KC said, not meeting Clare's eye.

He sneaked a peak at her for a fraction of a second and noticed that her blue eyes had turned wet. Oh shit, he thought, I made her cry, she hates me!

"Clare, I-I didn't mean, please don't cry," KC said.

"I'm not crying," Clare said, and she was right, KC noticed, she wasn't crying, she wasn't even sniffling.

"Oh," KC said.

They went back to studying in silence.

"So," KC finally said, getting up the courage to ask what had been keeping him from concentrating al afternoon, "Who's Corey? And John, and Jim, and whoever else Alli mention."

Clare put her book down again and smiled.

"I told you, they're some guys I met in California."

"Yeah, but Alli said you didn't meet them," KC reminded her.

"Alli's wrong, I would never kiss someone I hadn't met."

"You kissed them? All of them?" KC yelled. "How could you do that?"

"The same way you could kiss Jenna," Clare answered, and KC backed down a little, feeling guilty. "Besides, you and I aren't dating anymore, so, like Alli said, why do you care who I kiss?"

"I just never pictured you kissing a bunch of guys," KC said more calmly than before.

"Well, it wasn't a bunch of guys," Clare said.

"Okay," KC said, "So what's so special about Corey?"

"Oh, Corey? He and I are dating."

**review please :)**


	4. These Four Walls

**A/N: sorry it took too long to update! anyways, review please :)**

When Clare got home from the park, she went straight up to her room.

She plugged her iPod up to her dock, and turned it on shuffle. The song that played first was Miley Cyrus's "These Four Walls." Clare wasn't really a Miley fan, but something about the mellow beginning of the song and the powerful lyrics had always drawn Clare to it. She used to blast the song for hours after KC had dumped her, because the way their relationship had ended was similar to what Miley was singing about.

She leaned over to the dock and pressed repeat, then turned volume up.

Clare stayed on her bed for what seemed like hours thinking about what had happened that afternoon.

"_What were you thinking?" _ KC had yelled, getting in her face.

"_Why are you freaking out like this? You and I are broken up, you're with Jenna! Why do you care that I've finally moved on and have met someone else?" _She asked, getting in his face.

"_Because," _he said stubbornly.

"_Because why? KC, I can't read your mind!" _Clare had yelled in frustration.

"_What were you gonna do? Just let me fall for you again, even though you were seeing someone else?"_

"_KC, I wasn't letting you do anything, how was I supposed to know you were falling for me again?"_

"_Oh, you knew."  
"No, I didn't! I've been back home for two days, I've only just seen you today! And you're with Jenna! Do you know how badly it hurt me when you left me for her? I would never wish that kind of pain on anyone, not even the girl you left me for, and the fact that you think I'd do something like this shows you don't really know me at all."_

KC had stopped talking, he was too busy looking guilty, so Clare continued, _"I admit, that I was starting to have feelings for you again also, but in no way did I lead you on. You wanted to walk with me to class, you wanted to talk to me after school, and you wanted to study together. I was just trying to be your friend again."_

"_If your feelings for me were coming back, why did you even tell me about Corey?"_

"_Because you asked! And it had only been a few hours, not even a whole day! For all I know, these feelings could be gone in the morning. And besides, as I've said many times before, YOU'RE DATING JENNA!"_

"_You still shouldn't have brought him up."_

At this Clare almost lost it, but instead of screaming at him that he had been the one to bring up Corey, she said, _"I think we both need time to cool off,"_ and walked away, without looking back.

Clare was snapped out of her flashback by the buzzing of her phone.

"Hello?" She said as she answered the phone.

"Clare, why didn't you call me?" Alli demanded.

"Because I've been home all of two minutes," Clare said.

"Oh. How did it go?"

"He knows about me and Corey."

"What? Why did you tell him about Corey?"

"Because you brought him up and school, plus all the other guys from this summer, and he asked me! I couldn't lie!"

"Yes, Clare, you could! You'll never get him back now."

"Alli, I wasn't trying to get him back, I was over him, but…"

"But what," Alli said like she already knew the answer.

"But after spending practically all day with him, then going to our spot at the park to study, I think I might be falling for him again."

"Well I can tell he's definitely falling for you again. Before you know it, he'll dump Jenna and be back with you."

"I don't know if I even want to be with him again," Clare confessed.

"What? Why in the world not?"

"Because, it was my fault he left me in the first place. Do you know how difficult it was watching us fade? I let him down, I couldn't be what he wanted, so he found someone he could be."

"Clare, you're different now, you've changed. California changed you."

"No, it didn't. The only thing it changed was my appearance, and that will all fade in a few months! I'm still the same Clare who, three months ago, was still mourning the loss of her first boyfriend."

"Clare, California changed way more than your appearance. I've never seen you happier than I saw you today. You've never been so carefree and confident about anything in your life. You were dancing, actually DANCING this morning! And why were you dancing Clare, huh, why?"

"I don't know, I just woke up happy, then hearing that song made me even happier, I just felt like dancing."

"See, there is no rational reason for your dancing this morning! Three months ago, you would have never done that! Three months ago, you wouldn't have even been able to do that! You couldn't dance! So I don't care what you say, California did change you."

Clare laughed, because Alli was right.

"Alli, what would I do without you?" Clare asked once she'd stopped laughing.

"You'd die," Alli answered, and they both laughed again. "But, what are you going to do about KC?"

Clare sighed.

"I don't know. I think we both need space right now. I don't want to ruin his relationship, so I'll just keep my distance."

"Well what about me? I DO want you to ruin his relationship!"

Clare laughed again, "Alli, it's not about what you want. I'll just stay away from him for a while; maybe he'll dump Jenna on his own. In the meantime, I have to go; I promised Corey I'd call him and tell him about my first day back at school."

"Oooh, so you're still with Corey?" Alli asked.

"Well, I mean, why dump him if I'm not certain I'll be with KC?"

"That's an excellent way to look at the situation," Alli laughed, and Clare joined her.

"Bye, Alli, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye, Clare."

**remember, reviews = loveee 3**


	5. Jar of Hearts

**A/N: anyone seen the new episodes of degrassi? i really hate where they're going with KC's character. and i hear he's only gonna get worse. sighhhhhhh. well, as a one of my best friends recently said, "oh, degrassi. so much drama for teens who are just so very canadian." also, i think where they're going with clare is not too different from where i took her. so BAM! too anyone who said my clare was unrealistic :P haha not really, but still, they're making her more confident, changing her appearance, and getting her a new guy! (still praying KC comes back for her)**

**okay done with my little novel up there ha. enjoy this chapter! and remember, i own nothing!**

Clare woke up to the melancholy sound of rain pounding on the roof. She sighed, wishing she could go back to sleep and just skip school.

She'd been up practically the whole night. After she talked to Corey, all she could think about was KC. She was so confused.

A day ago, Clare was completely over KC and happy in a new relationship with a great guy. But after just one day with him, Clare's old feelings for KC were returning.

_I don't have anything to worry about, _Clare told herself, _KC is with Jenna and they're completely perfect for each other._

After a few more moments of lying in her bed and listening to the rain, Clare got up and began getting dressed. She put on one of her new outfits, but wore a black hoodie over it. It matched her mood and the weather perfectly.

Her dad offered to drive her to school, so while in the car, Clare put her iPod on the song that fit her mood perfectly.

"_I know I can't take one more step towards you," _Christina Perri sang from Clare's iPod, _"Cause all that's waiting is regret. Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore? You lost the love I loved the most. I learned to live half alive, and now you want me one more time."_

She had finally been happy, after so many months of being so depressed, and now KC thought he could come back into her life and sweep her off her feet again.

"_Who do you think you are, runnin' round leaving scars, collecting your jar of hearts, tearing love apart. You're gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your soul. Don't come back for me. Who do you think you are?"_

It was still raining when Clare's dad pulled up in front of Degrassi. Clare pulled the hood of her jacket over her head and jumped out of the car.

As soon as she got out, she saw KC sitting in front of the school's sign, surrounded by people, with Jenna sitting right next to him. When he looked in her direction, she ducked her head and walked as quickly as she could to her first class.

Even though she and KC have every class together, Clare managed to avoid him for the first half of the day. She'd get to class early, and sit right next to the door, making sure there were people sitting all around her, and leave as soon as the bell rang. She ignored KC's texts and IM's, and she'd delete his emails before she even read them. She didn't want to say she was hiding from him, but she kind of was. She was just too confused to talk to him at the moment.

"Clare!" Alli yelled as soon as she sat down at lunch. "KC has been asking all around if anyone's seen you today!"

"Well, that's nice," Clare said nonchalantly.

"Clare," Alli said, giving her a look that clearly said what is your problem? "KC wants to talk about what happened yesterday."

"Like I said, that's nice."

"What is going on with you?"

"KC thinks he can just come back in after three months and sweep me off my feet again! Well he's wrong, I'm too strong to fall for that again."  
"Well, maybe you should tell him that," Alli said, looking at something behind Clare.

Clare whipped her head around to find KC standing behind her.

"I'll leave you two alone," Alli said as she got up and left.

"Wait, Alli," Clare said, but it was too late. KC sat down where Alli had been.

"Hey Clare," he said.

"Hi."

"I've been looking for you all day."

"Well what do you know, you found me."

"Yeah." KC didn't say anything after that.

After a few moments of awkward silence, Clare finally said, "KC, why are you here?"

"I wanted to apologize for the way I acted yesterday. You were right about everything. I didn't have the right to be so upset, and at first I didn't know why I was, but now I do. I still have feelings for you, Clare." KC waited for Clare to say something, but she didn't, so he said, "And I want you to know, I dumped Jenna. She's caused me nothing but trouble since I met her and I –"

"Who do you think you are? You think you can just dump Jenna and that'll make everything okay between us? That I'll come running back to you after everything you put me through? Listen to me KC, before you try and deny it. It took so long for me to feel alright again. I spent months and months and months crying over you, endless nights where all I thought about was how I couldn't be the person you wanted me to be, so I obviously must not be good enough as myself, that maybe if I just changed, you'd want me back. I cried myself to sleep every night, and in the morning when I woke up and looked in the mirror, I'd think, 'there's nothing special about me, because I'm no Jenna,' then I'd cry some more. And now that I've come back from the summer in California, and I look different, better, you think you can just get me back? KC, my hair may be blonde now, but I'm not an idiot. And you know what else? It won't last. Away from the California sun, my skin will fade back to its natural pasty color. And my hair will fade back to the dull half brown, half blonde it used to be. So if the only reason you're into me again is because of my Jenna-ish appearance, you'd better just forget about it."

KC was stunned.

"Clare, I had no idea, I am so sorry."

"Well I appreciate your apology, but it doesn't change anything. The thing is, I regret kissing you in that supply closet last year. I wish I never had."

"Clare, why would you say that?"

"Because you broke all your promises! And now you're back, but you know what? You don't get to get me back."

"Clare, I just, I want, ugh!"

"KC, who do you think you are?" Clare asked, and while KC sat there looking confused and angry, she got up and left, trying not to let the tears fall. That was the hardest thing she'd ever had to do, but he needed to know.

**review please!**


	6. Love the Way You Lie

**A/N: don don don! next chapter :) so this one's kind of intense... kind of. i think. if its too much, just tell me and i'll change it. alsoooo i decided to introduce a certain character, he's new to season 10 and i absolutely adore him so far, so let me know if you figure out who it is :) and for the record, it's still a KC/Clare story, because as much as i love this new character, i will always ship KC/Clare. charolette arnold (sp?) apparently said in an interview that in the end, it'll be KC and Clare. also, AJ (the one who plays connor) ships Klare. is that creepy of him? no, i don't think so...well maybe a little, but who cares! THERE WILL ALWAYS BE HOPE FOR KC/CLARE!**

**disclaimer: i own nothingggggg. song is Love the Way You Lie by Eminem, obviously.**

KC stood up quickly as Clare was leaving, bumping into the table and chairs and making enough noise that half of the people in the caf turned and looked at him.

"Clare," he called, and when she turned around, he forgot what he was going to say.

"What KC? Are you just going to stand there and stare at me? Well, you know what? That's alright, because I like the way it hurts when you sit there and do nothing. Call me masochistic, but I'd rather feel that than nothing."

Clare turned and left, walking faster this time.

KC slammed himself back down into his chair. _I'm such an idiot! _He thought, _why can't I do anything right when it comes to her?_

He sat there for a long time with tears stinging in his eyes, threatening to spill out, when suddenly a hand touched his shoulder.

"Hey babe, I've been looking for you everywhere," Jenna said as she sat in his lap.

KC put his arms around her.

"I've just been…here," he said.

"Well come on," she said, kissing him with a smile, "Walk me to class."

She stood up and took his hand, and together they walked out of the caf and down the hall. That's when KC heard her crying.

He turned around, and there she was with Alli, Connor, and Wesley. He just stared at her.

"Well, are you just going to stand there and listen to me cry, or are you going to lie to me again?" Clare asked.

KC suddenly realized he was still holding Jenna's hand. He dropped it quickly.

"Hey!" Jenna said angrily.

"Clare, I-" KC started, but she interrupted him.

"No, KC, it's alright, I love the way you lie to me about every little thing."

KC's emotions boiled up to the top again. He grabbed his hair, and tried to walk towards her, but then stepped back. He didn't know what he was supposed to do.

"KC, what is going on here?" Jenna demanded, but KC just ignored her.

"Clare I'm so sorry, it's just…it's just…"

"It's just what, KC? Just spit it out, what is it?" KC had never heard Clare so angry in his life, and it kinda calmed him down a little, so he took a deep breath to clear his thoughts so he could tell her exactly what he wanted her to know.

"I, I can't tell you what it really is," he said.

She rolled her eyes, "That does everyone a great help, KC." She started to walk away.

"No, wait, I can only tell you what it feels like!" He called after her. She turned around to face him and raised an eyebrow, waiting. "Right now, there's a steel knife in my windpipe, and I can't breathe, but I'm still trying to fight for you! Can't you see that?"

Clare rolled her eyes, still flowing with angry tears, and turned again to walk away.

"Wait, where are you going?" He asked.

"I'm leaving," she answered simply.

"No, you're not," he said, rushing towards her, and grabbing her wrist, pulling her back to him, "Come back!"

"Ow, KC, let me go!"

"No, not till you listen to me!"

"KC, there's nothing you can say that would make me change my mind about you! You're just a liar and a cheater, now let me go!"

"No, Clare, I won't!"

"I believe," said a boy dressed in all black, with black hair and black eyeliner who stepped in between the two of them, with his arms crossed, "Clare asked you to let her go."

KC let go of Clare's wrist, and the emo boy turned to face Clare, speaking softly to her, caressing her wrist, asking, and "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, thanks," Clare answered.

"Okay," the boy said, now holding her hands. He didn't seem to believe her.

"I'm fine, really. I know how to handle this. KC has a temper, but he's harmless."

"Okay, I'll see you in class," the boy said cautiously, then with one last stern look at KC, he left.

"Who's that dude?" KC asked.

"What does it matter to you?" Clare asked, gathering her bag she had dropped.

"Clare I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. I guess I don't know my own strength."

"You usually do, KC, except when you get mad like this! That's another reason I don't want to be with you!"

"Well, next time-"

"Ha! Next time? There won't be a next time KC. You lied again, you don't get a second chance."

"Clare, listen to me!" KC begged. "I know we've both said and done things that we didn't mean, but your temper's almost as bad as mine, and you're just as blinded by love as I am!"  
"KC! This isn't love!" Clare started to walk away again.

"Please come back! It wasn't you!"

Clare stopped and turned.

"What?"

"It was me. All me. But you know, maybe our relationship isn't as crazy as it seems! All I know is I love you too much to walk away!"

"KC, for the last time, listen to me, and listen to me good. You're not in love with me, I'm not in love with you. You lost your chance with me when you walked away 8 months ago. And we will _never _be together again, because you're just a liar. And I'm going to walk away now, and if you try and call me back one more time, I swear I will make sure you never see me again. I'm done talking to you."

Clare turned and walked away, but this time, as much as he wanted to, KC didn't stop her.

"Clare, that was the most intense thing I've ever seen in my entire life." Alli said when she passed her. Clare stopped walking to look at her best friend. "What are you going to do now?"

"I'm going to pick my boyfriend up from the airport." Clare answered. KC could tell that she was trying to keep her voice calm and steady, but it was shaky.

"Corey's here?" Alli asked, getting excited.

"Yep, his school doesn't start back for another week and a half, so he's coming here. I'm taking him to the Back to School Formal tomorrow."

Alli and Clare started walking, and the last thing KC heard was Alli squealing in excitement. He watched their retreating figures, pain and anger filling up in him, threatening to spill out. He hated himself for hurting Clare, emotionally and physically; he would never forgive himself as long as he lived.

He turned to the nearest locker and punched it as hard as he could, then stuffed his bloody knuckle into his pocket, and walked away.

**sorry for my little rant earlier :) as always, review pleaseeeeeeee :)**


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